A Day at the Farm

Today we visited "the farm", a charming cottage just a short drive outside Lusaka. Richard, a white Zambian (ex pats, they call them) and his Czech wife and daughter live there. They were so lovely and warm and alive and engaging. I felt positively recharged. We played volleyball in the backyard alongside the singing birds and the papaya tree, and had lunch in their darling living room covered with paintings of family members and swaying African hips and beautiful Zambian countryside. Both of them are painters, and they live in a beautiful home on a farm that inspires a great deal of their work. The whole day was like playing in an issue of Town and County magazine. It was charming and magical. After being joined by more Czech friends, having lunch and wine, playing another two rounds of volleyball, and squeezing in a short nap without anyone noticing, we went off to the nearby game lodge to use their pool. We saw kudu and umpala and zebra and a giant warthog with hug tusks in the bush along the way. I've been reading this beautiful book on Africa full of photographs of ceremonies from all over the continent. It's been very fun, and it makes me want to stay and explore the whole world. After this trip I feel equipted to handle anything. I know about mosquitoes and heat, water, food, what to bring and research and how to build relationships under any circumstances. I feel so totally safe here. I know there are dangerous areas of Africa that are at war, and who's governments have failed them and left them poor and starving, but I hardly find them frightening. In fact, I'd love to explore them more than ever! I'm only afraid of the countries that America has wronged. I would hate to be an American there. Sometimes it's hard to be an American here when you meet people from Europe who have very strong opinions about you. But the people of Zambia are so loving and peaceful, and I imagine that most of the cultures want to learn about you as much as you want to learn about them. I remember being in China and people running up to us at the park to practice their English with us, and in Argentina they were just as eager to talk with you. The world seems like a big, friendly, loving place where people say hello to you when they walk into a room, and want to shake your hand and learn your name, and see you the next day.

Sunday was really nice, and I was glad for the ease, because I'm so dreadfully tired. I've been fatigued lately, and I'm either processing my whole experience (perhaps my whole life!), or I've picked up some small parasite. It's been hard to get up in the morning, and these last few days my mind has been racing with thoughts, and my nights have been full of intense dreams. I've had many moments where I've been very sad and I've felt very disconnected and alone. If only there were more words to describe all these feelings, and observations, and wishes for my life. I hope I'm more the wiser when I get home.